I’ve discovered something important along my personal process, and this discovery has come-about on the back of my own, what I perceive to be difficulty or inability to enjoy a smooth and free-flowing existence. To be blunt about it – I’m meeting my shadow-self in all of its ferocity.
I’ve been writing lately about how joyful and brimming my existence has been, and indeed it has been, but I recognize that that’s perhaps a bit narrow or one-sided of a view to give of my ascension process as it stands currently.
I say this because I, like all of you, also experience anger; frustration; uncertainty; the wish that things were just a bit easier or more in alignment with the higher realms I can only slightly remember.
I’d be remiss if I didn’t discuss the aspects of my personal process that would be easier to hide away from or deal with all on my own. It’s easy not to talk about the catalytic sadness I feel at times, or the immense disappointment when things in my Life don’t pan-out the exact way I expected.
It’s easy to talk only about the good, and not mention that I too get angry, curse at times, stamp my feet, etc. These are all completely-human qualities that we’ve incarnated under, genetically and spiritually, so that we could grow to understand them and thus, understand ourselves, in much greater ways.
I can remember when dear Konstantinos, who posts along with me on The Aquarius Paradigm, described a very-accurate dream he had in which I was depicted. He said he saw me wearing a black t-shirt (as I’m prone to doing sometimes) and he said that when he initially greeted me, I was very happy to see him and we had a short conversation.
However, when he left and came back to me, he claimed I was mean and insulting. I remember saying at the time that what we witnessed could’ve been an accurate depiction of my own shadow-self, which I certainly didn’t understand at the time as much as I’m beginning to now.
The reason I feel his dream was so accurate is because the traits of my shadow-self were depicted quite correctly. If I’m upset or angry for any reason, I recognize that I tend to look toward outward circumstances or even become insulting to those who Love and care for me, in the name of my own self-righteousness and anger.
I recognize this facet of myself, and in doing so, I can work to understand it and not necessarily control it, but reassign it to a position that will benefit me and those around me. Understanding my shadow-self in greater ways, I can work not to resort to anger or depression when it’s easy to, but take the depression I’d otherwise feel and use it as a drive to do more good, not just for the planet, but for myself and my family.
While it’d be easy to hide under the one-sided cloak of the joyous channeler who never experiences anger or sadness, to do so would be to hide away from a part of myself in need of active recognition. I wouldn’t be a complete human (or spiritual) being if I didn’t recognize every facet of myself, including my shadow self who’ll kick and scream until it’s blue in the face, and see them all as integral parts of me.
I’m learning lately that when we shine Light upon and Love those parts of ourselves we’d otherwise be ashamed of or hide ourselves away from, we actually curtail the negative influence they’d otherwise have upon us. When coming to a point of complete and true wholeness by recognizing one’s Divine self, one’s human self and one’s shadow-self, we’re able to curtail our own feeding of negativity and sadness.
I’m smack in the middle of this part of my process as I write this, and I’m still learning and will continue to learn more about this ideal. The basic message I wish to impart, which I do hope has come across clearly, is that I’m not going to hide away from recognizing aspects of myself that, at the surface, wouldn’t seem to be “of the Light”.
To judge anything, especially an active part of ourselves in need of recognition, as “of the Light” or not, is quite a distortion in its own right. My and your shadow-self is of the Light, because everything is of the Light.
Don’t be ashamed of yourself if you feel like you’re feeding into the old paradigm you’re ready to see-off, because you’re a growing and evolving human, who’s learning not to hide away from the lower-dimensional aspects of your personal existence, but to embrace them and bring them into the Light they’ve always been.
Wes Annac – Becoming secure and whole with myself as I continue to learn and grow.
(Thanks to John Smallman, whose latest message from Saul really helped put things into perspective for me.)
Contributing Editor: The Golden Age of Gaia